Anyway, maybe I did notice the night sky before but I became more aware of it the day we were moving to my new home...(Strange, because at this point, I already knew of stars and moons but never looked beyond that to observe the sky).

We moved by boat.   And as we drove along, I remembered drifting or more like floating on air, feeling at total peace, savoring the happy smiles on my parents' faces, enjoying the excited chatter of my siblings, the tranquility of the oh so...mmm...syrupy, brown sugar water...no white caps...not even night time ones although it was evening. 

Everything was awake and yet all were asleep.  Yep, even me, I was in waking and sleeping mode.  The scenery along the riverbank was not extraordinaire but there were different species of trees and flowers to look at...different things floating on the river... but gradually I grew bored of it all...and my gaze lifted to encompass the vast sky. 

White.  Cloudless.  And it made me feel helpless because suddenly I was worried birds might fly that high and things might eat their babies while they were gone.   Anyway, my worries soon disappeared...for lo and behold, guess what was following us...actually, guess what was following me...the whole time?   

Omg!  The moon.  The moon was following us...er...me.   I must have shouted out loud because my mom smiled and she confirmed it.  "Yes.  The moon is following us." 

Why did she say "us"?  Can't she see the moon was following me, that I was the magic in the boat? 

And do you know why the moon was following me?    Well, of course the moon no longer wanted to live on our old property...if you were living there and I was moving, heck, you would want to move with me too, wouldn't you?    Exacttly.  So of course the Moon would follow me to my new home like a little er big puppy...I mean on my old property she would have no life without me.  Trust me.   ( Lol...you see, at this age, my ego was already as large as the vast night sky. ) .
 
So I was determined to prove that the moon was following me, only me.  

After we arrived, Mother and my siblings got busy unpacking things indoors and Dad and his workmen were fetching things up and down the landing like large ants fetching humoungous potatoe chips up a gangway.

With everyone occupied, the scientist in me found the perfect opportunity to prove my claim.

I ran to the backyard and lo!  There was the moon... glowing down on me, oh, so smilingly.

I began walking south and holy moon!  She followed me too, all the way to the guava tree.  I was super excited. 

But behold, after I got over the initial wonder, I realized it had become pitch dark and the moon no longer seemed as friendly.   I mean, heck!  Why was she following me in the first place?   I mean we were already at my new property, so why can't she just settle down!!?   

Anyway, I turned tail and fled.  (you never know what these magical night creatures could do. )   To indoors and safety!  

And for the longest while, I was afraid of the moon, making sure my sisters were with me whenever it was dusky outside.

However, after I grew up, the Moon became my friend once again, coming on odd nights to peep, through the window where I sleep to keep me company.

Hmm...now how the heck did I managed to write a whole long blog on the Moon when the question asked about the night sky?  

Holy shucks!   Why??????????????         

                                                                  Full Moon Goddess

Amy I. Ramdass

Through my window she smiles brightly

She is my Guardian Angel nightly

And although she is miles and miles away

She has the strongest grip on my day

When she is high above in the night skies

I have this sweet urge to close my eyes

When she is not visible in the day

I somehow have the creative urge to play

Pulling off the very same stunt

She has this effect on my lunar month

I get all bloated and full as she waxes

And as she wanes, I am relieved of taxes

She influences my mind, my body, my mood

It gives me great pleasure to dance in the nude

She determines, as she orbits the whole wide earth

From the act of conception, to what we are at birth

Always wreaking havocs on my emotion

She controls me as she does the ocean

Playing with the push and pull of the tides

Anyway, along came a knock one sweet Saturday and before I had time to squirm deeper into my comfy hole of a bed,  guess what?  My blanket...er...my rock was being lifted off me.

Like&%what$#the@$&*?   "Hey!" I protested, blinded by harsh light.  God!  Who invented "light" anyway???  Nutcases, that's who.  Light kills me, okay!!!

"Hey what?" He grins.

I stare at him. The Lucifer.  Devil. Hades. Satan. Bloody annoyance. 

The nerves.  Pulling someone out of sweet, delicious sleep!!!    This was worse than high treason!!!    Trust me!!!    You know!!!      In the days of the wild, wild, west, he would already have been shot triple times above the neck.  In the minds of Tyranny, he would have been halved, quartered and drawn and burned at the stake on top of it all.    Or worse... Why, in the height of er religiondom, he would have been forced to attend church--

"Ah. I see what's going on here!" He looks even more amused. "You're very upset I pulled you out of your snug mind."

Of course!!!    "Shut. Up." I gritted at him. "What's your problem?"

He sighs as if the weight of the world was cascading down on him like molten lava.  (As if that's my problem???)    "I need your help!" He says.

I gape.  What?  Hades wants my help???  Am I missing something here???  Omg!! Omg!!!   How long have I been asleep under my rock?

"Oh, about a century...give or take a couple of minutes." He supplies this information as if my life depends on it.

"Shut. UP!" I screeched at him and this time I really mean it.

"What makes you feel so wealthy?" He asks instead of shutting up.  "I mean, you've absolutely nothing, not even this rock and yet you act like the Queen who has it all."

I scowl.  This is the perfect case of subtle insult ever!  Trust me.  I can detect these things a whole underworld away.   "You really, really wanna know what makes me feel wealthy??" I snap out in irritation.

"Yes. Of course.  That's why I took the risk of waking you from your deep slumber."  He said it as if that was sooooooo last century.  The nerves.

Okay. Fine.  I admit it. I am grumpy but you would too if you were awaken from a whole century of sweet slumber. 

Slumber?   Now that's an idea.  Hmm.  I need to put the devil back to sleep but how?    I mull it for a nano-second and then it hits me.  Ah!   I am going to put this devil where he really belongs.  Yep.  Under a rock.

I uncorked a bottle of beguiling attitude and splashed my face with it.  I heard his intake of breath.  Hah!  That's nothing.  I'm going to knock his socks off when I tell him about my cure for er...the unwealthy...!!!

I allowed him to bask in my glow and then I plunged the needle home.  "In order to feel wealthy all the time, you've got to consciously evolve..."

He is flummoxed.  "Why under earth would I want to do that??"

I smile smugly.  "So you may give it all back...to the world..."

He gapes. "Huh?  Why would anyone want to do that???"

I'm disappointed.  I had assumed he would grasp it the minute I said the words, "conscious evolotion" but what do I really know?  It could take him a whole eternity to climb down to my level...(You see...when you live under a rock, the Underworld is really the above world...)  Sigh. 

My smugness disappears on me, my plan to put him under a rock backfiring like a rocket blasting off to nowhere land.   "It's one way to gain it all." I say weakly.    I feel like a total failure.  Here I was, giving him a key to the universe and he was unable to find the door. 

And when you give, aren't you supposed to receive??  How come I feel so er...unwealthy???        I am agonizing silently  when something glints from his eyes.  It dazzles me and before I knew it, my rock came blissfully down on me like a long, lost blanket.

He pulls me into his arms.  "Oh, baby," he moans.  "May I stay here with you?"

"Ummm?" I say, my mind working overtime. I mean, I had plotted to put him under a rock...not under MY ROCK!!!!   Oh Hell. The highwater kind!!!

He began to rain kisses all over my face...soft, sweet, each one caressing me like manna falling from heaven.  Gosh, I'd never felt so wealthy in my life...and my bed under the rock never felt more comfy...almost as if I was lying on a gazillion crispy Canadian hundred dollar bills...

I breathe in the love of my devil realizing how lonely I had been under the rock all century long.

God. I feel so wealthy.   I don't think I need anything other than some berries, water and nuts of course.  Just make sure the latter are cashews.

Here, world...you can have my rock too... take it all...have it all...

You see, I've my devil...and psst...he's not only my rock, he's my wealth too...heck...he's my everything.  Mmm...Oh baby.  This is true wealth...

Oh what the heck, it's about time I proclaim the virtues of fatherhood in all men.  And if I'm going to lose some credit over that,  so be it...

Warning: Proceed with caution.  Mushiness detected ahead...

For the one who's no longer here.   These moments come to me all the time...not sure which one came first...but I recalled sitting on my father's shoulders while he fetched me across muddy puddles...and lifting me up high to pick a fruit or a celestial flower...

Once during Holy season, the fever to soak each other from head to toes and then doused them with colorful dust afterward was rampant.... and me not understanding this madness began crying at the top of my lungs and Daddy giving up his protective cover to come rescue me and hide me behind the door.

However, it wasn't all about protection or bringing me the brightest star or the sweetest fruit... there were times when Dad made me feel as beautiful as a flower... the earliest memory was when Mom outfitted me with the cutest, seer-suckers flounce dress of sky blue hue...and me wandering over to Dad who was busy pouring gasoline into his engine's tank...and me interrupting him from his height of concentration...to ask, "Daddy? Am I going to be the prettiest person at the wedding? "  And Daddy neglecting his task to swing me up high with laughter in his voice. "Yes, my baby, no one could ever be as pretty as you." 

And from that day to now...this is why I'll always be a daddy's girl...in fact, I refused to grow up....   in fact...I'm everything today because once upon a time, I was Daddy's little girl...

Sweetest of fathers, did you ever know?  

You were my Suraj, my Sun, my Brahma, the one who created me, my Vishnu, the preserver of me and Shiva, the one who facilitated but only when absolutely necessary, the death of me so I could take new birth...

However, it's the Vishnu, the preserver in you that I cherish the most.   The one who maintained me with fatherly love...the one who protected and cared for me.  You are the most compassionate person I've ever known....

And Dad, you were not the only one who gave me fatherly love...there are so many more...and today I would like to shine my love on the preserver within all men...The Brahma, Vishnu, Shiva...that godlike fatherly sweetness that exists in some form or the other all over my universe...

First I would like to say thanks to the creator God of Zaadz/Gaia...without your amazing creation, I would not be able to splurge my thoughts here...you've done a phenomenal thing, o lord of a virtual universe ...so happy father's day to you...

For my brothers...I love you too.....(Remember this?)  .....thanks for protecting me through the years...for washing my muddy princess feet with the last remaining drops of precious water...for braving sweltering jungles to bring me wild fruits and berries, for climbing coconut trees for that one elusive coconut, for buying me my first typewriter, for scaring away all the annoying boys...and so much more...

For my life partner, the one who nurtures me from the top of my head to the tips of each toe, without the protective and love filled warmth of your arms, I would be a witchy, bitchy wretch and unable to write one soft word of thanks here today...

For my son..."Chanda hai tu, mere Suraj hai tu..."   Sweet sparkle of my eyes, thanks for watching out for me.... yes, I've noticed the little father within you ever since you were knee high to a flower...and there's one incident that stands out...of me being attacked by a whole litter of barking puppies and you throwing yourself in their path with your, "You guys better not hurt my mom or I'll fix all of you." And so often, your reassuring words.  "Don't worry, Mom, I'll never ever let anyone hurt you."   
          
You are the one who made me realized that all men were at some point somebody's baby...that these very same men who nurture and protect need nurturing and protection too...

To my Grandfathers, uncles, teachers, in-laws, boss, friends, strangers...Happy Father's Day.

For all of you fathers and fathers-to-be on Gaia...and all over the world...Happy Father's Day.

a deep bow...and a bunch of fresh flowers too

Amy :-)

The past, the presence and the future...the past, the presence and the future...the past....hmm....love the past.....already my mind's dwelling on yesterday's question.  Either I get lost in the present one or or chew my lips off about the future question...so here goes...

BS: (((BS, btw is short for: - before script or bull scriptum))) so before I begin my BS: I've to tell you, I think this is the greatest question ever answered...trust my ego on this one...now shut up and read, read, read........

The story er the greatest, senseless story...begins with me feeling blissfully free. I am under my rock, btw, stretching and yawning and smiling like sunrise itself...God, I love awakening from a deep slumber...........

Sigh. I've never felt so free in my whole life. Funny thing is I'm not free...I am strait-jacket-strapped to a job because I've got mouths to feed, etc...etc... some freedom, eh?

After all, other than the Sun, who's really free in this universe?

........Earth?  Is she enslaved by Sun, held prisoner by his magnetic charms and constantly biting her lips off thinking she will die if she's ever deprived of his warmth?

((((((((((((Dependency!  Ah ha...))))))))) Hopeless addiction!

Anyway, I think Earth is free to leave whenever she wants to..........but Sunny has her under his hypnotic spell...((((((and before anyone gets upset with the Guy, just remember, he's not holding anyone prisoner...................and it's not the other way round either...................it's just that He has something I'm always drooling for...............so I flock around him like a vulture...and then I blame him for snagging me in with his mesmerizing warmth... ..............................................  Some nerves, eh?  ))))))

Okay. Where was I, before Sunny Boy hijacked my mind?  Oh yeah... Despite my lack of freedom, I feel free...in fact...I think I am freedom itself... .........

And this is what I want for the world...for everyone to become freedom itself...you know instead of being a prison house...(and that should also answer the question of yesterday...) 
           ***god, I am such a genius...trust my ego again...it knows the truth*** Lol....

However, that said...I know...I know...I can never give "freedom" to the world...they have to earn it for themselves....................................although I still wished I could earn it for everyone but I'm not Lady Jesus.      I'm powerless, helpless...Lover of the Sun, trying to shine warmly upon my fellow earthlings with pesky clouds constantly interfering...and oh...some of the bastards actually use sun-screen on me....as if I am er...yikes...toxic...

I know I should leave it up to each human to come out of their cubby holes in their own time to accept my warmth... ............................because I believe I should not impose my will or beliefs upon others...you see, I think this is what drives us all deeper into the web of mess..................................(and trust me, this is not a bad thing...the bad thing...pure mind torture... is the inability to comprehend why the rain falls on the Just and the Unjust and the effect is not the same on everyone...and how to make the rain work positively for us.................................) yes, when I try to control others, it only serve to drive me deeper into the maze of Maya..............to be trapped for all eternity...or until freedom is earned...by releasing the hold I have upon my fellow people...by setting each bird free...cripes, it should be my first commandment...

......"Thou shall not impose thy free will or beliefs upon thy fellow men!"  Actually it should replace......................."Ye shall have no other Gods but ME so keep on worshipping my ego to infinity and beyond and never, ever question why or you shall be knocked senseless by my hell fire and brimstones!!!!" 

What the...!  The bastard...and yes, Thou's a bastard until it's proven his parents were married...so Bastard Square until then........Bastard retangle too!!!

Conniving BIBLICAL 360 degrees BASTARD in all caps!!!                  Perhaps Thou didn't want me  to know that he was imposing his commandments upon me the whole @bsurd TIME. .........

OKAY...that ‘bit' off my chest, one must also see that I'm just as guilty of everything I accuse my sweet, caring, God of...yes............................. thou shall not impose your will or belief on others... and this is the thing...just by saying it...I am imposing my will and belief on others... .................SOME awful NERVES I have..........!!!

Okay. Okay, back to the story.  How to achieve freedom? Oh yes...how did I managed to feel free although I am still glued to the hips of the Sun?

I think I felt the most free right after I met with Shiva, God of Destruction...and Psst...God of the Kama Sutra as well...but don't tell him blabbermouth told you that...or he might just burned me down to the ground with his third eye.

So there I was...safe and snug under my rock...(frown). Where have I used that very same sentence before? Hmm........................can't remember.  Oh well..............you know...Alzheimer could step in at any age...or is it amnesia...perhaps the rock fell on my head?? Oh God!!!  I've amnesia..............

...............Anyway...yes...there I was...under my rock...when my third eye opened...and guess what I saw? God. I am still stunned. Anyway, in my inner vision, I saw Shiva...God of Dark...(don't gape at me, the Man er God has more names than stars in heaven) yep, I saw Him sitting on a rock...      ((((well, he better not be sitting on my rock!!!))))

.............Wait a minute? Am I going anywhere with this story? Or is the story going somewhere with me??...Yikes...I think the story is taking me everywhere...because why else am I suddenly remembering this:-    Shiva once burned to smithereens, er...to ashes, the God of Desire...(I'm rolling my eyes here)...Ladies and Gentlemen, that from a Kama Sutra lord!!!    (He must be a terrible lover....no patience!!!)

...................Anyway, be afraid for me...be very afraid...one mishap and I'm dust!!!  Okay, where was I? Yeah. After I had my first-third-eye vision, I squirmed out from under my rock. By the time I was done wriggling out, yes, I was hot and sweaty and  flustered...but holy, Moly, sweet glory!!!   GOD!!!   I felt free.   I was free!!!

..............I remembered frowning. Would I always feel this free? I glanced up...and what do I see? Yes. You probably know what I am seeing... my whole dang life, I've been buried la Vida loca under a mountain!!! And not just any mountain!!!

The Himalayas Mountain!  Wait a min--    Or is it Mount Kailash?

......Who cares...mountains are mountains... ................Anyway, guess who is sitting atop of it all???                 Yep. You guessed it.    Shiva himself.  Huh!!!   So off I went to see Shiva in a huff of mad freedom......................Needless to say, it was a long trek up!

...................I arrived at the peak to find him totally into another universe. You know!!! Like what the #HECK% is wrong with this universe?    I glare at his third eye with all my might but nothing happens. .........

Huh? How come?

And suddenly I am reminded of the story of the Northwind and The Sun. One should never use force in a certain situation if one needs someone to open up their shirt and expose his...er...soul to you..............(So I became Sun-ladylike...smiling sweetly, shining warmly and so sure Shiva would get all warm and ready to unwrap his soul for my viewing...) Ooops...I almost forgot to mention, I also ran off to pick some fresh, fragrant flowers for his sweet, lotus feet........(yes, at the peak  of mountains are flowers opening regularly)  I brought him some Tulsi too.... Tulsi's fragrance is heavenly.  Mmm...I want some now!!!

.....................Anyway, you think that would work, but abso-dang-lutely...still no show!!!!  (The guy...and what a guy...actually a Guy in Full...........................)         Anyway, the guy continued to ignore me, his mind fixed on some inner star...as if dancing to solitude afar...

..........................."Hey you." I say out loud. "Look at me...I'm more interesting than that universe you are obsessed over....." But he continued to ignore me...his peaceful face telling me, he knew, knew I was under his spell...or rather I was a non-existing rock for all he cared!!!

He was in a really deep trance. How to snap him out of it? And frankly, if the feminine sunrise within me couldn't awaken him...then will the real Slim Shady please stand up...please stand up.........

Okay...back to the story. So I waited and waited and waited and just when I made up my mind to leave, lo and heart bracingly slow, Shiva opened his eyes...yikes, all three of them and looks directly at me. ...............

God he's so handsome. His face is serene and peaceful.  I so want to go where he has been...and oh...never mind.............

He smiles at me as if he has never seen such a beautiful morsel in that other universe he was so obsessed with previously... ...........

............................"What can I do for you?" He asks me. (He asked the question as if he owes me a favor.)

I frown. Oh yes...he does owe me... (You see...I was supposed to be mad with him...but instead I choose not to blow up that path...like he did to poor Cupid...........

"I need you off my rock...er...off my mountain..." I begin with a stupid stutter...

 "Nope." He says calmly. "I was here first...you're the one who invaded my space."

I was at a loss for words...either that or something hijacked my tongue. What a bully!!!  I continued to stare in stupefaction. Some nerves-

"So where did you come from?"   He asks after I failed to come up with a hot retort.

I almost rolled my third eye. "I didn't come from anywhere...I've always been here...and you see, Sir...you've got to set me free...you're sitting on my rock..."

"Why should I do that?" He looks at me keenly as if he could hardly wait to receive my answer.

"...............um.......because I'm trapped...you've to...lift your weight off my chest...er...rock..."  I also mumbled an unladylike sentence under my breath..........................."please cart your sunny a&%s@#s   ....er...sunny side off my mountain..."

"Come closer." He beckons me. I slid closer to him and he leaned over to whisper in my ear. "I've only imprisoned you under your rock because you've imprisoned me."

"What?" I spluttered. "Have you gone mad? I've never, ever imprisoned another soul...not in my heart, not in my mind, not under my rock...not anywhere?"

"Oh yeah?" He smiles. "Open your heart and take a look."

So I did...and goodness, gracious me...I'm taken aback...good lord........so many I've imprisoned... and Psst...you know what sickens me the most?             I actually imprisoned Jesus as well...(poor guy...how many centuries now?)          and all because some Dufus told me I should open my heart and let Jesus in...poor guy...the minute he stepped into my heart...slam!  The door shut and locked....and he was imprisoned in my heart and forced to be my slave...like the poor genie enslaved by Aladdin's lamp!!!               Can you imagine, Jesus not even allowed a relaxing staycation because I'm always mewing for this and pouting for that?

"Set them free..." Shiva instructs me lovingly..."and you will also set yourself free."

So I not only set all the Gods free, I set my whole bloody family tree free...

"Oh wow!" I say to Shiva. "This has got to be the greatest commandment I have ever heard...I think I am gonna tell it to the world..."

And then my face fell...I knew instantly it would not make sense to the multitude because a "rock rat" like me has yet to earn my audience...which I probably lost by foolishly telling them that their emperor was a wolf in sheep...er...cheap ...............actually their emperor never had any new clothes on...

Shiva smiles as if he could read my thoughts.  "It depends who tells the tale.  Commandments from Rock Rats will be received like duck falling on water's front...it'll make no refreshing splash on the brain..."

I frowned. "Why is that? There has to be a reason why people lap up even the chewing gum from a Dalai Lama but will not hesitate to stone a rock rat like me for opening her blasphemous mouth...even though ...sob....even thought...it might be blasphenous wisdom..."

......Shiva crinkles his forehead in that way I love. Gosh...I can sit for days and admire the way his third eye goes up to the sky...way beyond mars.

"Yessss." He says slowly. "There is a reason but you know what...let's leave that tale for another day... you have already used up all the credit on your master card..."

Shiva held up a palm...like Neo in the Matrix...probably to stop my poison glares no doubt...

The nerves. Bummer. Bastard.  I thought he was my Sun...and that I could crawl out from under my rock to obtain information er bask in his warmth whenever I was ready!!!

He frowned as if he was reading my mind.  "The sun is always there...however, wear sun block and be glad clouds and earth block the glare as well...................too much sun could be detrimental for your health.................and don't be too greedy for information...it's like eating more food than your body needs.....................................if you can't absorb it all, it's water on duck's back...too much could even drown you..."

Bla, bla, bla!  Yada, yada, yada!!!  He sure knows how to preach...and preaching is what I don't need an iota of!!!

Yikes...the truth does set one free but if you don't know the whole truth, it will make one stomping mad.... and that could be dangerous...(too many have used their free will to destroy themselves and others because they thought they knew the truth...)
 

Shiva spoke again.  "Try not to snag-a-sun, become your own sun.  You're capable of being your own everything, your own cook, your own doctor, heck, you can even become your own Jesus..."

"Why would I want to become Jesus?  In case you haven't noticed, I'm a woman..."  Cripes! What do I do to convince him, unbutton my goddamned-

He stared at me in exasperation, his third eye suddenly active...almost like a volcano about to erupt.

So I shut up fast and applied my listening makeup...I really don't want to end up like Cupid.  Whew!  I almost made it into the history books.  Yikes.  I prefer herstory books...so there!!!

"I mean don't go running to "me"  for every teeny little problem...become your own God and fix all your own damn problems that you created in the first place..."

"Er...I never..." I say.

"Be like the Sun, be like me."   He commands.   "And everything will come to you...just like you came to me..."

"That's not true." I scoff.  "You've to make an effort to go to people before anyone will come to you..."

His smile makes me grit my teeth.  "The Sun never comes to anyone yet the Sun touches everyone...........all the time...never worries about receiving...but always giving the sweetness of his warm rays, he touches everything on earth..........and the further away he is from earth...the gentler his rays..."

"In other words, he's always in a boiling fury..." I ventured. "And to avoid the anger of his heat, one should always stay at a safe distance?"

No answer.

Yeah, I grumbled in my mind...............Become like the sun, shining idiotically forever...I grumbled some more.......... "If you ask me, that's the passport to detachment itself...what fun is that?"   Can you imagine?    I touch everyone but no one touches me?        I mean, what fun is that really?  Just one pattern all over the universe...everywhere you go...Suns everywhere!!!     

Shiva spoke again.  "Just go back under your rock and ponder everything I just said...and then come back to me if you still have questions."

I see what's going on here...he's saying that if I don't get it and I come back to him for further explanation, then I am the true idiot......

Ha!